Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Closing the door

Despite the craziness that has been our life for the past few months with selling our house and buying a new one. Despite the fact that we could have closed on our new house yesterday but my tax accountant husband wants to wait a week to see if this stimulus passes which will give us a HUGE tax credit. And despite the fact that I'm tired and worn out from packing, cleaning, unloading, carrying boxes, and having no home, I cried my heart out when I shut the door on our old house on Sunday.

I could feel it coming on. As I emptied each room, vacuumed and closed the door, I found myself opening the door back up for one more peek. I stood in Little Bit's room and remembered how it was hot pink when we moved in. I tried to etch in my mind where her crib was in her tiny little room. I looked in our bedroom that was so small you had to turn sideways to walk beside on side of the bed. Then I stood in our empty kitchen and I cried and cried and cried. I'm talking sobs. 

We lived in it for almost four years to the day. From August of 1996 to February of 2005 when we bought it, I had moved 11 times. I called it our shoe because it was so small. It was our first house. Our first home as a family. Where I almost set in on fire by melting a plastic lid in the oven. Where Oscar the Boxer shredded an entire package of toilet paper and it looked like it had snowed 6 inches. Where I lived when my Papaw Lonzo died. Where we brought Sophia to when we left the hospital. Where we almost froze to death when the electric went off during a blizzard. Where it took us hours to get home if there was a wreck on the main road. Where Santa and the Easter Bunny first came. Where the Steelers won the last 2 super bowls. And on, and on and on.

Now I'm sitting it this brand new house. It feels foreign and big and quiet because no memories have been made here yet. In fact, it feels empty. And despite being filled with a million boxes and furniture, it feels emptier than the house that we left 8 miles down the road.




13 comments:

maria said...

I know how you feel, but it is nice having some space !
Good luck unpacking.

Jenny said...

My gosh, you almost made me cry! You will make many more wonderful memories in you new house and one day soon it will feel like home and you won't be able to imagine living anywhere else.

Jami said...

You got my tears rolling :( I know I'll be the same way if we ever move. Big hugs, you'll make lots of new memories soon enough!

Paula said...

awww, what emotional day...

Anonymous said...

I understand how you feel but everyday with Sophie is a memory maker. I love your new home and I am so happy for all three of you.
G

Jonathan's Mommy said...

That is really touching! We've lived in the same house for the past seven years and, even though I would like to have more space, I hate to leave all those memories.

Anonymous said...

Oh Kim! Just think of it as a box. All those things come with you, but now you have a different box to put them in...a bigger box for more memories.
Char

Rhianna Shea said...

I remember that hot pink room! and every other insane color those rooms were painted... aw so sad, I could've cried too when you talked about Papa :(
Hopefully soon I'll have a house too so I won't move every year like you did college-pre married life!

Anonymous said...

Congrats on your new house! It will feel like home in no time. You all will make lots of new memories here! And you'll never forget your old ones. Then again maybe a brother or sister for Sophie would fill your new house up real quick -haha! -Amy

Twin Mommy Law Chick said...

*tear* But you're movin on up to better things!

Anna said...

So let me just say, I totally have done the whole plastic lid in the oven thing and almost burn the house down! :] I think I'll stick to fast food instead of cooking! haha

Megan said...

Aww...such a sweet and sad post. Hang in there, girl...the new place will be home before you know it!!

Shana-Lynn said...

What an emotional time for you. By Summer, you'll have wonderful new memories in your new home! Good luck getting all settled in.